My initial reaction to such a rule was puzzlement over how I was supposed to know how other people wanted to be treated if I didnt even know them (!?!).

Lain, you find yourself in an interesting situation, not only speaking to large groups of people, but having important and controversial information to convey (this is just one issue amoung many).

Obviously it’s important to get the point across, otherwise it would be an injustice to many of the things that need to be told. By the law of large numbers, chances are that people will get offended from time to time.

I did not really address the “bastard” issue, because I’m not sure of the best way to handle it, even after reading all those posts. Perhaps putting things in context of what the views were at the time, and using the word “illegitimate” would be a decent practice though.

I guess that, even though there are a number of contoversial topics, some are easier to joke about than others.

Anyhow, I’m glad you see what some of us mean.

I also think that there’s a bit of a age disconnect here. I don’t know if anyone is with me on this one, but having been born in the 80s mostly I think of the word as a minor insult (or swear word) or a punchline in movies. Clearly that isn’t the case with everyone.

I’m of the opinion that “illegitimate” is just as bad as “bastard” simply because the word actually spells everything out. It’s weird to think about how “illegitimate child” is thrown around so freely when it’s such a harsh judgment call on a person that had nothing to do with their position in life.

Finally, I just want to stress that adding a touch of humor to the situation is not merely pointing at Joel Chandler Harris and going HA! HA! I think it’s more in line with the tone of Harris’ writing (and the tone of this blog) to temper very serious subjects with a little humor. After all, the Br’er Rabbit stories did just that–replace the Critters with the slaves themselves, and all of a sudden things aren’t so funny.

That said, I’ll certainly be more careful with what I say (and who I say it to!) in the future.

I don’t think making a joke of a good man who we should all be proud of is funny. I’m sure it wasn’t funny to him.

I’m just sayin’.

I think your humorous intent is probably pretty clear in most instances, but yes, you should probably give second thought to using the phrase ‘bastard’ or ‘illegitimate’, and coordinate it with the modern description of ’single parent family’. It still sounds like a good way to start talking about his life! Also, well done on using the term ‘tar baby’ so well.

And please, don’t be shy! I posted this not because I was indignant, but because I was curious about your reactions–before yesterday I’d never heard anyone voice their opinion like that on this matter.

Ida Beth, I certainly don’t say it to 6-year olds. Since I don’t normally give tours, the time I usually bring it up is when I’m speaking to Rotary Clubs or Garden Clubs or Daughters of the Confederacy Clubs or whatever. That is the instance where I use it for (and it continually gets) laughs.

Susan, I should have clarified, but in this particular context I wasn’t joking around. My point in this case was that Joel Chandler Harris succeeded not despite, but perhaps because of the fact that he was an illegitimate child of Irish descent with (worst of all!) red hair in the 19th century. His somewhat painful upbringing allowed for him to eventually find a connection with the population of slaves on the plantation. Some of the slaves took on paternal roles in his life, something that wouldn’t have been possible otherwise and greatly influenced his career as a journalist and as an author.

I’ve got to agree with Bryan on the matter of etiquette. As frequent blog readers have no doubt come to understand, the staff of the Wren’s Nest under the age of 25 is a lot of things, but classy ain’t one of ‘em. Clearly, I have failed whomever it was that led that pre-cottillion class in 6th grade, and I’ve come to terms with it.

Lain, it seems like, on the subject of JCH’s parents, you might also come upon the occasion of using the f-word. And it might be accurate, and might convey the intensity, and might be funny. But you’d hesitate, right? And not just because some classify it as “slang.”

Just my thoughts!